For most of us, having our first time sex is a life-changing experience that can open up a whole new world, bring you closer to your partner, and give you a better understanding of your own body. But it’s not something to take lightly. There are a few things you should think about to make this experience better and less painful for you and your spouse.
1. Talk about it some more
Talk to someone mature and experienced about your decision, whether it’s an older brother, a friend, or a doctor. Sure, you may be certain in your thoughts right now, but talking about it out loud can help you think about it more deeply. It may frighten you a little, and it may even raise some questions you hadn’t considered. That’s fine; it just means you’ll be even more prepared once you’ve figured out how to solve the problems and overcome the obstacles.
2. Prepare yourself for first time sex
Anyone who tells you that you don’t need to prepare anything and that everything will come to you spontaneously is false. We may all benefit from a little forethought so that we are not caught off guard by any event that may arise. Learn about sexual activity, protection strategies, sexually transmitted illnesses, sexual organs, and erogenous zones. Then double-check that you have everything you might need, such as condoms and lubricants. If you’re not sure what will work best, pick a few different kinds at any medicine shop, order them online, or ask a friend to accompany you if you’re scared.
3. Recognize consent
Consent is the most vital aspect of having sex, whether it’s for the first time, the last time, or any time in between. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise; it should be verbal and enthusiastic. Some people will try to minimise the situation or make jokes about it. If you feel unsafe at any stage, reconsider your decision. Make sure your spouse understands and respects that “no” means “no” and “stop” means “stop.”
4.Create a sense of trust
You may believe you’ll stay with your lover for the rest of your life, or you may realise that you’ll only have sex with them once. Knowing that you can trust this individual when it comes to your physical and emotional health, on the other hand, may make the experience a lot nicer and safer for you. You owe them nothing but one piece of information regarding your sexual history: when was the last time you were tested for sexually transmitted diseases, if you tested positive for any, and if you were treated for it. You should also ask the same questions of your partner. It’s entirely up to you whether or not you tell them it’s your first time; however, telling them can help them be extra cautious, and they won’t be surprised if there’s any blood (which may or may not happen). Talk to them about their expectations, and then state your own.
5. Have fun with foreplay
Take your time with foreplay, even if you’re apprehensive and just want to get it over with. Women can take a long time to become aroused, which causes the vagina to lubricate itself naturally. If there is enough lubricant, your first time will go much more smoothly. Without lubrication, you may endure discomfort and pain, and the friction may even result in a minor rip or tear in the vaginal wall.
6. Don’t attempt any mad moves
You could be tempted to try out some sensual positions and tricks on your spouse, and if you’re exceptionally flexible and fit, they might even come naturally to you. However, you won’t know how it feels unless you try it, and when it comes to sex exploration, it’s safer to take it one step at a time. It’s never the best the first time, but it gets better without going to extremes.
7. Remember hygiene
It’s a good idea to clean up your nails beforehand. Before you begin, make sure you thoroughly clean your hands. Even if you don’t ejaculate, use a new condom for each sexual session. To lessen the risk of urinary tract infections, women should pee before and shortly after intercourse – snuggling can be postponed by a minute. To urinate, men should wait 15 minutes after intercourse. Once you’re finished, wipe up any bodily fluids using a moist towel or tissue.